I Will Never Complain About Traffic Again – Wait, That’s Not True…

Beijing currently has cars stuck on stretches of highway for the ninth day in a row.

According the Wired.Com blog, Autotopia:

“Whatever traffic hell you endured getting to work this morning is nothing compared to what’s happening in Beijing, where a mammoth traffic jam is entering its ninth day with no relief in sight.

Thousands of trucks have jammed National Expressway 110 since Aug. 14, creating a traffic jam stretching 100 kilometers. Authorities attribute the mess to highway construction exacerbated by accidents and breakdowns. Police are trying to keep tempers from flaring in what is the second massive jam to tie up the highway in the past month.”

Wonder if this is a valid excuse for missing work for a couple weeks…

From Sky News: China To Sterilise 10,000 To Curb Births

9:12am UK, Friday April 23, 2010

Peter Sharp, China correspondent

Health authorities are planning to sterilise nearly 10,000 people in southern China over the next four days as part of a population control programme.

The rule of one child per family has been in force for decades

Some of the people in Puning City will be forced to have the procedure carried out against their will.

Amnesty International says forced sterilisation “amounts to torture”.

Reports in the Chinese media say that Puning Health authorities in Guangdong Province have launched a special campaign to sterilise people who already have at least one child in order to ensure local birth control quotas are met.

Chinese newspaper reports say that those who refuse to be sterilised have seen their elderly mothers or fathers taken away and detained.

Hundreds of people in Puning are said to have been locked up.

Kate Allen, Director of Amnesty International UK, said: “It is appalling that the authorities are subjecting people to such an invasive procedure against their will.

“Reports that relatives are imprisoned as a means of pressurising couples into submitting to surgery are incredibly concerning.

“The Puning City authorities must condemn this practice immediately and ensure that others are not forcibly sterilised.”

More than 1,300 people in the city have been held in local government buildings where they were given “lectures” on China’s family planning regulations.

Huang Ruifeng is the father of three girls.

“Several days ago, a village official called me and asked me or my wife to return for the surgery,” Huang told the local paper. “Otherwise they would take away my father.”

He refused.

His father was later rounded up and detained by the authorities.

According to Puning rules, farmers are allowed to have a second child if the first child was a girl.

Best Fortune Ever: Tastes Like Chicken

So I think we’re all enthralled by the fortunes we get when we snap open the remnants of the fortune cookies carelessly tossed underneath the cartons of chinese food when we bring home take-out. I got a fortune a couple weeks ago: “You are not illiterate”… um…thanks?

My post title refers to the fortune I continually recount receiving one fateful day; it makes me laugh.

For some reason I got on the topic when chatting with someone and remembered hearing about an interesting book I have regrettably still not read, called the Fortune Cookie Chronicles by Jennifer 8. Lee regarding the mysteries of Chinese cuisine.

I have, however, heard radio segments and read commentary regarding the book and some of its anecdotal trivia. Like the fact these cookies are actually Japanese in origin, not Chinese . The origin of these munchy enigmas in the states is somewhat murkier. The debate even invoked a trial in 1983 to decide whether the American birthplace was in fact San Fransisco or Los Angeles.

What about the fortunes? I recall reading an article somewhere about unusual jobs and they featured a girl who had a position writing fortunes for these forecasting sweets. One of the largest manufacturer of the cookies in the states, Wonton Food Inc., maintains a database containing on the order of 10,000 fortunes. There was an interesting feature in the New York times about the company’s vice president, Donal Lua, who composed the fortunes for the company’s confections for quite a stretch,  but at the time of the article, had run into a seriously debilitating case of writer’s block.

The commentary on the novelty of these fun fortunes is hardly uncharted territory.You can find multiple webpages and blog entries listing real fortunes people have recieved:

From http://www.associatedcontent.com/article/199819/the_best_fortune_cookies_ever.html?cat=22

“Life is not a struggle. It’s a wiggle.”

“About time I got out of that cookie.”

“Don’t kiss an elephant on the lips today.”

“Help! I am being held prisoner in a Chinese bakery.”

“Because of your melodic nature, the moonlight never misses an appointment.”

“Never wear your best pants when you go to fight for freedom”

From http://www.innocentenglish.com/funny-english-mistakes-bloopers/funny-fortune-cookies.html :

“a closed mouth gathers no feet”

“If you think you’re too small to be effective, you’ve never been in bed with a mosquito.”

“If a turtle doesn’t have a shell, is he naked or homeless?”

Of course, if none of these amuse you on a somewhat meaningful level, remember you can always improve any fortune by adding the words “in bed” at the end. Or, you can get mis-fortune cookies with bits of wisdom like the following: “How many roads must you travel to realize you are not welcome down any of them?”

From Webcomic XKCD

One of the most intriguing incidents described both in the book and among other scattered sources is the fortune cookie lotto winners.People who frequent the Chinese take-out populous will recall fortunes generally contain lucky numbers. During the March 30th powerball drawing in 2005, instead of the expected 3-4 winners, 109 people stepped forward to claim their prize. Initial thought turned towards some kind of hoax or scam, but a little research revealed all winners had played the same set of fortune cookie numbers: 22, 28, 32, 33, 39, 40. Jennifer 8. Lee gives a much more detailed account in her book’s prologue.

If you want to take a stab at making these yourself, complete with snarky pieces of advise, check out this:

Fortune Cookie Recipe

…. while reading this excellent article on the argument and trial over the cookies’ stateside beginnings

And most definitely check out the blog helmed by Jennifer 8. Lee, author of “The Fortune Cookie Chronicles” which can be accessed at:

Fortune Cookie Chronicles: The Blog

You Haven’t Seen Pollution Until You’ve Lived in China

China is in a volatile state right now, environmentally speaking. It’s people are suffering and experiencing significant health problems, birth defects, early deaths,and at the very least, severe impacts to their daily lives.

A new photo documentary project titled “Pollution in China” by photographer Lu Gang is causing some stir:

The project is composed of shocking pictures of filthy landscapes and Chinese citizens living in equally filthy conditions.  40 such photos can be viewed here

It’s now been confirmed that a large driver in the birth deffects children experience in China is pollutant effects.

The environmental issues are staggering and can impact the way these folks make a living. The picture above is from an article about water and air conditions in China.  The water is a vibrant green from so much overgrowth of algae likely from the input of excess nutrients (i.e. sewage). Too much algae means grazers can’t keep up, much of it dies and sinks, is decomposed by oxygen-gobbling bacteria which severely depletes oxygen availability for other organisms. Fish and other commerically important creatures die.

But it’s not just their problem. The earth is a connected system. Clouds of air-fouling chemicals can travel across the globe and affect countries far from the originating source. Ocean currents can carry contamination miles and miles away from it’s starting point. It’s a messy problem figuratively and actually, and we need to keep innovating new solutions.

More on the issue:

Pollution in China affecting rainfall

Pollution-China Blog